Saturday, September 26, 2009

Round 6

Everybody knows me a the hospital now. It's a big party! We're all semi-sedated and making friends. One woman told me she grew two toenails from her new post-chemo treatment barely able to control her laughter. What do you say?
My cousin Margaret has started driving me and we've started having lunch afterwards which is nice. I like to get out of the house as much as possible because I can have a lot of down days watching HGTV. I have decided that I do not want anything to do with marble countertops, ever.
Things are going pretty smoothly, despite the fact that Ian is peeing the bed almost nightly. Not sure how to handle his emotions. There's so little direction on what to do when you have such a little one in this case. Probably because breast cancer and small children don't often mix together. Ian has just laid up on asking me to put my hair back on. For a long time he was saying that he gave me "the owie". He's as honest as a person can be, really. This isn't pretty. I just want to hold him all the time and protect him from the yuckiness of it all. We try to tell him the truth and he covers his ears. He wants this all to be over NOW.
We have those feelings,too, but have trained ourselves to reign it in. I want so desperately to throw a tantrum, but it won't come out. So I clench my teeth all the time.
I'm so grateful for all the kind words and food and love that come our way weekly. Little pushes upward.
Returning to the guys in my bed. Thinking about getting a king-size!

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