Sunday, December 8, 2013

Writing, Hawaii and Cold

     We, Us Three, got back from Maui a few days ago--to freezing temperatures in the Bay Area.
We're on Ka'anapali Beach just two days before departure. 

"Please bring the warmth back with you," my mother messages me. 

     It's hard to believe that we are going to be trading white, hot sand for the gray, cold concrete. I notice how fast towards the future time goes when I look at my phone, check my emails. Scrolling down with my forefinger while bringing on the future. 

     I stop. I put the phone away and wish I could throw it into the ocean. If only it didn't cost so much I might just do that, I think.

     Instead, I shove it deep inside my straw beach bag and scrape the top of my right hand in the motion. I look towards the ocean again, where Ian and Kyle are bobbing up and down, there goes Kyle, now Ian, against the waves. It's sunny forever in this moment. 

    It's five days after that day on Ka'anapali Beach, and I'm deep into a book about Armenian culture and heritage. My final essay of the semester is due in two days. I have been thinking about this essay for at least the past week, if not preparing for it my entire life. So I think I'm golden. But I don't want to get too cocky. Cockiness seems to work against even the best people. Once you think, hey, I've got this essay-, job-, parenting-, school-, life-thing figured out, the canoe flips over and your new bride is eaten by a shark. Well, that's what happened to one person. (I spent one sleepless night of our vacation looking up shark attacks on Maui.)
  So I'm reading and writing and checking around for sharks. Sounds about right.